Sometimes I wake up in an old band shirt and I have Disney Princess hair.
So really, I should have baby deer mowing my lawn, mice sweeping my floors, and little birds hanging up laundry. I think Disney owes me that much at the very least. They are, however, nowhere to be found, and I am left back on the grind. So like any Disney princess would do, I freak out about my life not being completely perfect. I know that’s a silly thing to say, but when things are going well, I like to focus on the tiny little problems. Doesn’t everyone do that? I hope I’m not the only one. Lately, my issue is competing for friendship.
I am in the Friendship Hunger Games.
I’m competing against no one in particular, but feeling like I have to constantly prove myself. Do you have people like that in your life? That make you feel like you constantly have to impress them just to get some sort of friendship going? It’s obnoxious. What do you WANT from me? Is there someone I could possibly throw a radioactive bee hive at to gain your friendship? While I am a pretty entertaining person, I am not here for your amusement. I’m not a court jester, I’m a mother freakin’ friendship princess. (By the way, this is the most I’ve ever said princess in my entire life). I am an AWESOME friend. Seriously if Voldemort held a personal vendetta against one of my friends, I’d be their freakin’ Ron Weasley (I can’t be Hermione, I’m not that smart). I’m not saying all of my friendships have resulted in sunshine and rainbows, but the place I am now in life, I have wonderful friends, true hearted friends. I’m currently going through the friendship dating routine since we’ve just moved to a new place. I lucked out and had a few gals move with me from Okinawa basically, but I’m still out there trying to establish new friendships. Some have been coming along nicely, where they accepted my extreme nerdiness and awkward conversational skills, and others? Well, others have made me feel inadequate and unworthy of such friendship. Is there a mirror around here I can talk to? Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who’s the not bitchassy-ness of them all?
It’s hard out there for a princess.
I suppose I should just ignore it and move on, focus it all on the women who enrich my life and don’t make me feel like Quasimodo. Seriously, look at that guy, forever trying to get into a clique and ending up in a Church attic ringin’ bells and crap. If I up and say I’m moving into a Church, PLEASE bring me back to reality. I have great friends, I have a best friend, I have relationships I don’t have to prove myself for, and can be completely…myself! I don’t need to put myself out there over and over again and be ignored for whatever reason. I like who I am. I have people who invite me to things, support me, and make me smile. Those are the people I should continue to grow with. From here on out, I’m done trying to murder people in the forest for people, I’m gonna go hang out in a meadow, put flowers in my hair, and tell all my new (and old) friends they’re the prettiest girls in all the land!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go do man stuff because this post was EXTREMELY girly.